There is a sense of safety that comes from having a large spanning group of friends, and while it feels good in the moment at a large party or loud meal, I personally have found them to always leave me wanting more.
I believe there is a risk we run when collecting acquaintances rather than seeking out and pursuing true relationships.
And that is not to say that big groups of friends are a bad thing, but rather to suggest that we take the time to truly seek knowing the people that are around us and tighten up our inner circles.
Large Groups Are a Safety Net
Large groups feel a lot like a safety net. When I first got to school I found myself running around desperately seeking people to put on a mental list of meal time loneliness deterrents, and how selfish that was of me to do.
People are not collectibles, they are not simply the means by which to avoid isolation, they are souls and stories, and they should be cherished as such. Rather than give only the small shallow parts of ourselves to many, why not share the deepest extents of our dreams and passions to a chosen few?
And who are these chosen few?
- They are the small groups of unlikely friendships made possible only by the love of the father.
- They are the circles of women finding strength in vulnerability and peace in the honesty of others.
These are groups made of women you seek out, and women that seem to find you somewhere along the way. And these are the groups to cherish.
These groups take work, they take hard moments of honesty and intentionality beyond any other friend group.
The word “Foster” is defined as to “encourage or promote the development of something, typically regarded as good.” If we are to foster these small groups, it takes intentionality in chasing after those in it. It takes going out of our ways to love them more than we love ourselves. And what you sow into these friendships you will reap tenfold.
And that is the beauty of the small group, when you chose a select few to love properly and receive love from in return, you have more love to give and deeper bonds to make.
Finding the Chosen Few
How do you find these special women?
It begins with reaching out and opening yourself up to finding friends. But sometimes this not easy.
Insecurity can keep us silent. Slipping in and out of church doors without saying a word to those around we might shy away from what could be life-changing friendships. However, we cannot live our lives blaming our loneliness on others not coming directly to us and reading our minds. You find things by seeking them out, so do that, pursue what you know your heart needs!
Chase after those few that God has chosen to grow you alongside, and when you find them, be filled with the wisdom and love they have to offer, and pour right back into them.
Abandon the insecurities that tell you to chase endless shallow friendships and rather prayerfully seek the deep connections and accountability that can be found in a small group.
Leading the Chosen Few in a Small Group
Where do I begin?
One way to begin is by starting a Nourish Together Group.
Nourish Together Groups are women coming together weekly to pray, share a meal, and discover truth using the weekly Nourish Scripture.
If you are interested, we have a free online resource called the Nourish Together Leader’s Guide. Find all the tools you need for your journey, including our step-by-step plan to get you started. Even if you are not ready to commit – but you just want to find out a little more – this is a great way to just learn more before stepping out. Click here to learn more about Nourish Together.
Nourish Scripture: Acts 2:42-47
Blog written by Millicent Phillips. © 2019 Treasured Ministries.